Have You Talked to Your Loved Ones About These Uncomfortable Topics?

By Ann E. Salek, Attorney at Law
Critchfield, Critchfield & Johnston, Ltd.

As an attorney, I help many people get their documents in order appointing their financial power of attorney, health care power of attorney, executor, trustee, etc. However, many clients do not involve their children in making those decisions. Consequently, the family may not know your desires regarding many different issues. Furthermore, you may not be able to communicate those desires at the time of crisis.

While your documents should state your wishes to a large extent, the more you elaborate and communicate those wishes to your loved ones, the easier it will be to fulfill those wishes. Following are some questions that may generate discussions with family or loved ones:

  • Who do you want to assist you with your finances if you are unable to handle them yourself?
  • Who do you want to assist you with your health care decisions if you are unable to make them yourself?
  • At what point would you concede to moving to an assisted living or skilled care facility?
  • Is it your strong desire to continue to live at home at any cost?
  • Do you want to live with one of your children?
  • Have you visited long-term care facilities and prefer one over the other?
  • How do you want to pay for long-term care if needed?
  • Do you have long-term care insurance, or have you investigated the option?
  • Do you anticipate using Medicaid benefits to pay for long-term care?
  • If you anticipate using Medicaid benefits to pay for long-term care, have you investigated the spend down options or any options to potentially set aside and protect some assets?
  • Are you or your spouse a veteran? If so, does your family know where your discharge papers are?
  • At what level are you comfortable being removed from life support?
  • Do you want a DNR?
  • Have you discussed any life support and DNR issues with your doctor?
  • What type of funeral/cremation do you want? Have you considered pre-planning and pre-paying for your funeral/cremation?
  • Do you want certain sentimental items to be given to specific people?

    While not everyone is comfortable discussing all these issues with their children or loved ones, reviewing these questions may at least instigate the thought process. You may not have even thought through these issues yourself to even be able to tell your family or loved ones your desires. Hopefully reviewing these questions will instigate some thinking on your part and encourage you to conduct additional research with a trusted professional and have those difficult conversations with your family or loved ones.
Ann E. Salek, Ohio State Bar Association Certified Specialist in Elder Law, and Estate Planning, Trust and Probate Law
Critchfield, Critchfield & Johnston, Ltd.
Attorneys at Law
4996 Foote Road, Medina, OH 44256
330-723-6404 • www.ccj.com

Opinions and claims expressed above are those of the author and do not necessarily reflect those of ScripType Publishing.